6.) Still/Born [Available on Shudder]
Somewhere between Insidious and Paranormal Activity, we've got a little ditty about a woman who is afraid that there's something evil and supernatural out to get her newborn child -- OR MAYBE IT'S ALL IN HER HEAD??? While the "is she bugpants or is there demons" doesn't really do anything particularly new with that hoary old trope, there are some effective moments here and there, and I think the lead couple starts out pretty charming during the honeymoon phase of non-spookiness. It was better than I expected from the trailer, but not something I'll probably go back to again.
That being said, I think if you're a newish parent, it's probably a lot more effective given just how much of the horror is being mined from BABY IN DANGER.
SHOCKtober
Re: SHOCKtober
7.) Threads [Available on Shudder]
I had watched a bit of Threads a few years back, but not too much of it overall. After I mentioned to my wife that it (along with The Day After) was pretty much traumatizing to a certain age of kid who saw it when it first aired on TV she immediately wanted to watch it, because that's how we roll. And you know what? NOW IS MAYBE NOT A GREAT TIME TO WATCH THREADS. Threads is much less a traditional horror movie in that it is pretty much designed to make you feel bone deep terror at what's going on; it's 35 years old, but the unblinking dramatization of "here is how society and people unravel after nuclear bombs fall on England" can easily be applied to, oh, let's say climate change. There's maybe nothing all that surprising in the film overall, and it's definitely "British TV movie" levels of acting and effects, but honestly that all kinda works in its favor of just being an unflinching misery march into DON'T LET THIS HAPPEN warning territory. A fun night with the family for all.
8.) In the Tall Grass [Available on Netflix]
what if grass stepped on YOU
Based on a novella by Stephen King and Joe Hill, and directed by Vincenzo Natali (of Cube and Splice), I had higher hopes for this than what the end result was. It's fine. It's about a couple who stops next to a massive field of grass, and then go inside to find a lost child calling for help from inside, and then shit gets weird fast. It tries a little TOO hard to make the innocent waving fields of grass seem menacing as fuck, it relies a lot on a child actor who ain't that great, and it's relatively unsatisfying when it comes to the whole "what's going on" angle. But Patrick Wilson seems to be having fun, and there are some cool "what the fuck" moments. It's a Netflix Original Picture(TM) down to the bone, where you won't entirely feel like you wasted your time watching it but you also don't really feel much more than a shrug by the time the credits are being pushed aside for a trailer for Big Mouth.
I had watched a bit of Threads a few years back, but not too much of it overall. After I mentioned to my wife that it (along with The Day After) was pretty much traumatizing to a certain age of kid who saw it when it first aired on TV she immediately wanted to watch it, because that's how we roll. And you know what? NOW IS MAYBE NOT A GREAT TIME TO WATCH THREADS. Threads is much less a traditional horror movie in that it is pretty much designed to make you feel bone deep terror at what's going on; it's 35 years old, but the unblinking dramatization of "here is how society and people unravel after nuclear bombs fall on England" can easily be applied to, oh, let's say climate change. There's maybe nothing all that surprising in the film overall, and it's definitely "British TV movie" levels of acting and effects, but honestly that all kinda works in its favor of just being an unflinching misery march into DON'T LET THIS HAPPEN warning territory. A fun night with the family for all.
8.) In the Tall Grass [Available on Netflix]
what if grass stepped on YOU
Based on a novella by Stephen King and Joe Hill, and directed by Vincenzo Natali (of Cube and Splice), I had higher hopes for this than what the end result was. It's fine. It's about a couple who stops next to a massive field of grass, and then go inside to find a lost child calling for help from inside, and then shit gets weird fast. It tries a little TOO hard to make the innocent waving fields of grass seem menacing as fuck, it relies a lot on a child actor who ain't that great, and it's relatively unsatisfying when it comes to the whole "what's going on" angle. But Patrick Wilson seems to be having fun, and there are some cool "what the fuck" moments. It's a Netflix Original Picture(TM) down to the bone, where you won't entirely feel like you wasted your time watching it but you also don't really feel much more than a shrug by the time the credits are being pushed aside for a trailer for Big Mouth.
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Mongrel
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Re: SHOCKtober
Threads sounds like it's something out of the same school as When The Wind Blows, which also manages to be harrowing as fuck in spite of the entire comic/film (film was directly adapted) simply being an old couple trying to go about their lives (also after Nuclear bombs have pasted England).
Re: SHOCKtober
It is very much that. I asked the lady if she'd seen it / heard of it when we finished watching Threads, and when she hadn't, if she remembered the animated or storybook version of The Snowman. And when she had, told her that it was basically that, but with radiation sickness slowly murdering octogenarians.
9.) The Furies [A Shudder EXCLUSIVE!!]
So, six Jasons drop onto a remote island ..
That's basically the premise; slasher movie battle royale. It's a good premise. It's a very bad movie. Six women are abducted and wake up in crates out in the Australian outback, and six slashers (all looking like existing slashers with the serial numbers filed off) also wake up there, and then the hunting begins. It tries, oh it TRIES to say something akin to Cabin in the Woods about complicity with horror films, but the hamstring budget that was clearly only spent on the gore shots, the terrible acting, and the pointless teasing out of its plot points makes this an 80 minute slog. There was only one moment that made me smile in the entire movie, which was when the Jason-esque slasher is stalking toward a girl, notices the main protagonist hiding far behind her, and then just gives her an incredibly jaunty wave. That single moment of brief levity made me wish for what this movie might've been in more competent hands and just made the rest of it even worse.
9.) The Furies [A Shudder EXCLUSIVE!!]
So, six Jasons drop onto a remote island ..
That's basically the premise; slasher movie battle royale. It's a good premise. It's a very bad movie. Six women are abducted and wake up in crates out in the Australian outback, and six slashers (all looking like existing slashers with the serial numbers filed off) also wake up there, and then the hunting begins. It tries, oh it TRIES to say something akin to Cabin in the Woods about complicity with horror films, but the hamstring budget that was clearly only spent on the gore shots, the terrible acting, and the pointless teasing out of its plot points makes this an 80 minute slog. There was only one moment that made me smile in the entire movie, which was when the Jason-esque slasher is stalking toward a girl, notices the main protagonist hiding far behind her, and then just gives her an incredibly jaunty wave. That single moment of brief levity made me wish for what this movie might've been in more competent hands and just made the rest of it even worse.
Re: SHOCKtober
10.) Into the Dark: Pure [Streaming on Hulu]
Into the Dark is a monthly horror movie anthology series that sets a horror movie in and around the concept of a holiday related to whichever month they're releasing in.
Every single one of them that we've watched has been terrible. Like, bottom of the barrel, sub-Tales from the Crypt level bad. Now admittedly this is only like, three of them, but it hasn't been encouraging! The fact that they're all 90 minutes or so just makes it all even worse because you're stuck with the TV-movie rinkydinkness of them for all that much longer than you would be in TftC or Creepshow or something.
Anyway, Pure (the "Daughter's Day" entry) doesn't fall far from that tree. Most frustratingly, the premise is one that's got potential in the way it centers the terribleness of purity culture and fatherly "ownership" of their daughters, and there's a lot of thematic richness that could be mined about how gross that entire situation is. Pure hits a lot of that along the way, but also throws in a whole thing with the protagonist maybe or maybe not seeing a VENGEANCE DEMON that really drags the whole thing down. I rarely turn my nose up at something involving the supernatural over everyday horrors, but in this case I would have preferred if this particular story stayed a lot more grounded and made the eventual catharsis that much more earned.
Probably the best Into the Dark flick we've watched, but that bar's on the damn ground.
11.) Little Monsters [Streaming on Hulu]
This movie is a fucking DELIGHT. It is genuinely clever, genuinely funny, genuinely heartfelt, and so much better than half the horror (not to mention horror-comedies) we see in theaters that it seems vaguely criminal that it got dumped straight to streaming. They have an absolutely adorable child actor just killing it (and surrounded by mostly charming kids to boot), a scuzzbag Chris Hemsworth type working his redemption arc, a goddamn radiant Lupita Nyong'o once again proving she should just be in everything all the time, and Josh Gad as a children's TV personality who seems to understand perfectly well that "children's TV personality who is secretly profane" has been done enough and so just hits 60 with it and never stops.
Basically, a grade school class goes to a petting zoo / farm tour / children's field trip tourist trap to have an adorable day out. The farm is directly next to a US military base doing zombie testing. You got your chocolate in my peanut butter, etc. It's fabulous.
Into the Dark is a monthly horror movie anthology series that sets a horror movie in and around the concept of a holiday related to whichever month they're releasing in.
Every single one of them that we've watched has been terrible. Like, bottom of the barrel, sub-Tales from the Crypt level bad. Now admittedly this is only like, three of them, but it hasn't been encouraging! The fact that they're all 90 minutes or so just makes it all even worse because you're stuck with the TV-movie rinkydinkness of them for all that much longer than you would be in TftC or Creepshow or something.
Anyway, Pure (the "Daughter's Day" entry) doesn't fall far from that tree. Most frustratingly, the premise is one that's got potential in the way it centers the terribleness of purity culture and fatherly "ownership" of their daughters, and there's a lot of thematic richness that could be mined about how gross that entire situation is. Pure hits a lot of that along the way, but also throws in a whole thing with the protagonist maybe or maybe not seeing a VENGEANCE DEMON that really drags the whole thing down. I rarely turn my nose up at something involving the supernatural over everyday horrors, but in this case I would have preferred if this particular story stayed a lot more grounded and made the eventual catharsis that much more earned.
Probably the best Into the Dark flick we've watched, but that bar's on the damn ground.
11.) Little Monsters [Streaming on Hulu]
This movie is a fucking DELIGHT. It is genuinely clever, genuinely funny, genuinely heartfelt, and so much better than half the horror (not to mention horror-comedies) we see in theaters that it seems vaguely criminal that it got dumped straight to streaming. They have an absolutely adorable child actor just killing it (and surrounded by mostly charming kids to boot), a scuzzbag Chris Hemsworth type working his redemption arc, a goddamn radiant Lupita Nyong'o once again proving she should just be in everything all the time, and Josh Gad as a children's TV personality who seems to understand perfectly well that "children's TV personality who is secretly profane" has been done enough and so just hits 60 with it and never stops.
Basically, a grade school class goes to a petting zoo / farm tour / children's field trip tourist trap to have an adorable day out. The farm is directly next to a US military base doing zombie testing. You got your chocolate in my peanut butter, etc. It's fabulous.
Re: SHOCKtober
12.) The Gate [Available on Amazon] [Watched with Giant Bomb's Film and 40s commentary.]
Stephen Dorff vs. Tiny Demons! This movie is one of those ones that I feel like was in constant rotation on cable and weekend tv movies when I was a kid and yet which I never saw more than tiny little snippets of here and there. It's not particularly complicated or particularly good, but it's a fun time. A hole opens up in a kid's back yard, and weird demon shit starts happening. Mostly notable for the fun composite and stop motion effects on the teeny tiny demon men invading our earthly realm for destruction and for the kid being Stephen Dorff.
Stephen Dorff vs. Tiny Demons! This movie is one of those ones that I feel like was in constant rotation on cable and weekend tv movies when I was a kid and yet which I never saw more than tiny little snippets of here and there. It's not particularly complicated or particularly good, but it's a fun time. A hole opens up in a kid's back yard, and weird demon shit starts happening. Mostly notable for the fun composite and stop motion effects on the teeny tiny demon men invading our earthly realm for destruction and for the kid being Stephen Dorff.
Re: SHOCKtober
13.) Midsommar: Director's Cut [Available on Apple TV, Blu Ray coming soon, Certain People as always are unaffected by exclusivity]
Hereditary is one of my favorite horror movies in years. Toni Collette is a force of goddamn nature in that film, and it uses its camera in incredibly effective and subtle ways -- I'm not sure I've seen a director (let alone a first feature) who was better able to capture grief and dread in the frame. Midsommar is Ari Aster's follow-up, and if Hereditary is akin to his Rosemary's Baby, then this one is definitely his Wicker Man. It fits incredibly comfortably into the "strangers bumble into paganistic ritual" genre to the point where it might not be all that surprising what happens at various points, but that doesn't make it a bad film by any means. He still frames things incredibly well. It's goddamn gorgeous, and set almost entirely in bright, sunny vistas (the director's cut adds a few night time scenes that are apparently not in the theatrical version). His capturing of the emotion of a moment is not just done really well, but vital to several scenes throughout the film. Florence Pugh gives an incredible goddamn performance in the lead, and William Jackson Harper is there being as Chidi as someone who's not Chidi can be. And it's also kinda hilarious? Darkly comic, at the very least, but everyone's mileage may vary on that point. Definite recommendation if you're down for a three hour horror movie (two and a half for the theatrical cut).
Hereditary is one of my favorite horror movies in years. Toni Collette is a force of goddamn nature in that film, and it uses its camera in incredibly effective and subtle ways -- I'm not sure I've seen a director (let alone a first feature) who was better able to capture grief and dread in the frame. Midsommar is Ari Aster's follow-up, and if Hereditary is akin to his Rosemary's Baby, then this one is definitely his Wicker Man. It fits incredibly comfortably into the "strangers bumble into paganistic ritual" genre to the point where it might not be all that surprising what happens at various points, but that doesn't make it a bad film by any means. He still frames things incredibly well. It's goddamn gorgeous, and set almost entirely in bright, sunny vistas (the director's cut adds a few night time scenes that are apparently not in the theatrical version). His capturing of the emotion of a moment is not just done really well, but vital to several scenes throughout the film. Florence Pugh gives an incredible goddamn performance in the lead, and William Jackson Harper is there being as Chidi as someone who's not Chidi can be. And it's also kinda hilarious? Darkly comic, at the very least, but everyone's mileage may vary on that point. Definite recommendation if you're down for a three hour horror movie (two and a half for the theatrical cut).
Re: SHOCKtober
14.) Hell House LLC 2: The Abaddon Hotel [Available on Shudder]
Eh. This is pretty much a textbook case in how not to do a sequel to your low budget surprise-success. It uses the same location as the first movie, but more stripped down and less interesting, goes ~BIG~ on the ~MYTHOLOGY~ that was not that intriguing to begin with, and repeats the spooks and bumps from the first film in slightly remixed but diminished ways. It also feels very much like a stopgap "we are already making the trilogy-ender to be released next year" type of film. The first movie was pretty alright for what it was, this one is just one big shrug. Nonetheless we'll probably finish things up with this series by the end of the month just for completion's sake.
Eh. This is pretty much a textbook case in how not to do a sequel to your low budget surprise-success. It uses the same location as the first movie, but more stripped down and less interesting, goes ~BIG~ on the ~MYTHOLOGY~ that was not that intriguing to begin with, and repeats the spooks and bumps from the first film in slightly remixed but diminished ways. It also feels very much like a stopgap "we are already making the trilogy-ender to be released next year" type of film. The first movie was pretty alright for what it was, this one is just one big shrug. Nonetheless we'll probably finish things up with this series by the end of the month just for completion's sake.
Re: SHOCKtober
15.) SiREN [Available for Rent/Purchase]
V/H/S was a found-footage anthology flick released early in the decade that did alright for itself and spawned a few sequels -- like most anthologies, it was pretty hit or miss. One of the more memorable shorts was called "Amateur Night" and followed a group of scuzzbags taking some women back to a hotel room to secretly film them having sex with them to create amateur porn videos. Too bad for them that one of the women they brought back was a killer succubus. Womp womp.
SiREN (hooray for random dumb intercapsing) is a feature length expansion on that short, low budget enough in look and feel to have been a SyFy channel original picture if not for the copious nudity, and drops the found footage conceit. And to my great surprise, it's kind of rad? The scuzzbags are changed to men out on a bachelor party (with the brother of the groom still firmly in scuzzbag territory) who are lured out to an old mansion when their first strip club experience is a bust so that they can partake in some kind of exclusive club experience -- and it's there that the groom is paired up for a "no sex" encounter with one of the ladies there. Who is a killer succubus with a killer singing voice. Womp womp.
It's got shades of Species and Splice about it thanks to the way the titular Siren is acted and realized, and the actress (returning from Amateur Night) manages to make the character surprisingly endearing in an innocent "I just want to kill everyone who isn't the man I've decided I like because he was nice to me once" kind of way, but what made me really actually dig this movie was everything going on around the edges. The big bad of the film is the man running the secretive club, and he's not just some pimp or human trafficker who happened to end up with a mythical creature locked up in his brothel; the club is actually stocked full of mythical weird shit that you only get little glimpses and tastes of, private rooms where men are confessing to ghosts, memory-stealing gorgons using their powers for leverage and payment for services rendered, satanic rituals going on. It's a good example of "just tease some really weird shit going on outside the edges of the main story that will make you wonder about it, but don't over-explain everything or get bogged down in it" world building that made the movie more than I expected.
So yeah, end of the day, it's still primarily about an attractive hellbeast imprinting on a hapless dude and wreaking havoc trying to get to him in a low budget killer monster movie kind of way, but the devil's in the details.
V/H/S was a found-footage anthology flick released early in the decade that did alright for itself and spawned a few sequels -- like most anthologies, it was pretty hit or miss. One of the more memorable shorts was called "Amateur Night" and followed a group of scuzzbags taking some women back to a hotel room to secretly film them having sex with them to create amateur porn videos. Too bad for them that one of the women they brought back was a killer succubus. Womp womp.
SiREN (hooray for random dumb intercapsing) is a feature length expansion on that short, low budget enough in look and feel to have been a SyFy channel original picture if not for the copious nudity, and drops the found footage conceit. And to my great surprise, it's kind of rad? The scuzzbags are changed to men out on a bachelor party (with the brother of the groom still firmly in scuzzbag territory) who are lured out to an old mansion when their first strip club experience is a bust so that they can partake in some kind of exclusive club experience -- and it's there that the groom is paired up for a "no sex" encounter with one of the ladies there. Who is a killer succubus with a killer singing voice. Womp womp.
It's got shades of Species and Splice about it thanks to the way the titular Siren is acted and realized, and the actress (returning from Amateur Night) manages to make the character surprisingly endearing in an innocent "I just want to kill everyone who isn't the man I've decided I like because he was nice to me once" kind of way, but what made me really actually dig this movie was everything going on around the edges. The big bad of the film is the man running the secretive club, and he's not just some pimp or human trafficker who happened to end up with a mythical creature locked up in his brothel; the club is actually stocked full of mythical weird shit that you only get little glimpses and tastes of, private rooms where men are confessing to ghosts, memory-stealing gorgons using their powers for leverage and payment for services rendered, satanic rituals going on. It's a good example of "just tease some really weird shit going on outside the edges of the main story that will make you wonder about it, but don't over-explain everything or get bogged down in it" world building that made the movie more than I expected.
So yeah, end of the day, it's still primarily about an attractive hellbeast imprinting on a hapless dude and wreaking havoc trying to get to him in a low budget killer monster movie kind of way, but the devil's in the details.
Re: SHOCKtober
My favorite kind of monstergirl is the "shameless remorseless killer who happens to actually love some specific person" so my interest is piqued
Succubi are usually boring though, unless they go full horns/tail/hooves/wings
the ones that just look human are like
okay that's not a monster, it's just a girl, have some balls and give her weird pupils at least
Succubi are usually boring though, unless they go full horns/tail/hooves/wings
the ones that just look human are like
okay that's not a monster, it's just a girl, have some balls and give her weird pupils at least
Re: SHOCKtober
They do go full tail and wings and claws with her, but usually in fleeting effects shots for the most part due to the low budget; they come out and retract at various times, and mostly she's just a girl who sometimes gives pretty good monsterface.
16.) One Cut of the Dead [Available on Shudder]
This is a very very cute zombie movie. An extremely amateur film crew is filming an extremely bad zombie flick when (surprise surprise) revelations come out about the haunted old location they're filming in and suddenly they're being beset by the real undead -- and by the director who refuses to stop filming them because he's finally getting the real reactions and emotions he always wanted. And per the title, it's all done in one take, with clever-stupid bits cutting away from gore and such so they can then make the "special effects" happen (a la throwing a fake arm in from off screen). Very cute, cleverly done, and surprisingly heartwarming by the end,
16.) One Cut of the Dead [Available on Shudder]
This is a very very cute zombie movie. An extremely amateur film crew is filming an extremely bad zombie flick when (surprise surprise) revelations come out about the haunted old location they're filming in and suddenly they're being beset by the real undead -- and by the director who refuses to stop filming them because he's finally getting the real reactions and emotions he always wanted. And per the title, it's all done in one take, with clever-stupid bits cutting away from gore and such so they can then make the "special effects" happen (a la throwing a fake arm in from off screen). Very cute, cleverly done, and surprisingly heartwarming by the end,
Re: SHOCKtober
17.) Cold Skin [Available on Shudder]
Take two parts Tower Defense and one part Shape of Water and you'll get something akin to this movie. On the brink of WW1, a man travels to a remote island to replace the meteorologist who went missing there. The only things on the island are the house where the former meteorologist lived and a lighthouse where the reclusive lighthouse keeper currently stays -- which is surprisingly fortified. Our hero soon realizes why when in the dead of night, his new domicile is set upon by angry, gurgling amphibians from the deep. Unable to defend himself alone, he forms an uneasy truce with the lighthouse keeper to stay with him and his sexy, gurgling amphibian pet / sex slave. By day, they all get to know each other, and by night, they fight back against the siege of monsters from the ocean, the risk of death and / or madness ever increasing.
Ray Stevenson pretty much kills it as the lighthouse keeper, and the balance between the day and night scenes of "relaxing" and the sieges on the lighthouse are really well done. It's a well shot, well paced, well acted movie that I really liked overall. And it just cements Shocktober 2019 as the Shocktober of Monster Fuck.
Take two parts Tower Defense and one part Shape of Water and you'll get something akin to this movie. On the brink of WW1, a man travels to a remote island to replace the meteorologist who went missing there. The only things on the island are the house where the former meteorologist lived and a lighthouse where the reclusive lighthouse keeper currently stays -- which is surprisingly fortified. Our hero soon realizes why when in the dead of night, his new domicile is set upon by angry, gurgling amphibians from the deep. Unable to defend himself alone, he forms an uneasy truce with the lighthouse keeper to stay with him and his sexy, gurgling amphibian pet / sex slave. By day, they all get to know each other, and by night, they fight back against the siege of monsters from the ocean, the risk of death and / or madness ever increasing.
Ray Stevenson pretty much kills it as the lighthouse keeper, and the balance between the day and night scenes of "relaxing" and the sieges on the lighthouse are really well done. It's a well shot, well paced, well acted movie that I really liked overall. And it just cements Shocktober 2019 as the Shocktober of Monster Fuck.
Re: SHOCKtober
18.) Event Horizon [Available on Hulu] [Watched with Giant Bomb's Film and 40s commentary]
There's been plenty of digital ink spilled about Event Horizon, but for good reason. Paul WS Anderson really does have a knack for making compellingly watchable godawful movies, to the point where it's hard to even really call them godawful even though you know in your bones that they really are. Sam Neil, Laurence Fishburne, and Jason Isaacs manage to act (and overact) the hell out of a space crew straight out of Alien going straight into Hell when they go to visit the missing spaceship that came straight out of Hell.
The visual effects range from "1997-era FMV video game cutscene" to "actually REALLY well done in a way that still holds up", sometimes in the span of a few seconds, and there are plenty of cheap and not particularly effective jump scares, and some of the really fucked up imagery isn't QUITE as fucked up as you probably remember it being, but at the end of the day Event Horizon is the best kind of movie for the reason most Paul WS Anderson movies in the 90s were the best kind of movies: it's never boring, always moving, and most of the time doing something fun in the process.
There's been plenty of digital ink spilled about Event Horizon, but for good reason. Paul WS Anderson really does have a knack for making compellingly watchable godawful movies, to the point where it's hard to even really call them godawful even though you know in your bones that they really are. Sam Neil, Laurence Fishburne, and Jason Isaacs manage to act (and overact) the hell out of a space crew straight out of Alien going straight into Hell when they go to visit the missing spaceship that came straight out of Hell.
The visual effects range from "1997-era FMV video game cutscene" to "actually REALLY well done in a way that still holds up", sometimes in the span of a few seconds, and there are plenty of cheap and not particularly effective jump scares, and some of the really fucked up imagery isn't QUITE as fucked up as you probably remember it being, but at the end of the day Event Horizon is the best kind of movie for the reason most Paul WS Anderson movies in the 90s were the best kind of movies: it's never boring, always moving, and most of the time doing something fun in the process.
Re: SHOCKtober
19.) The Perfection [Available on Netflix]
Do you miss incredibly trashy straight-to-VHS erotic thrillers from the early 90s? If so, maybe I can interest you in THE PERFECTION, a movie that seems designed to throwback to those tawdry tales of jealousy and revenge and male-gazey lesbian sex scenes. The third in the DON'T TRUST ALLISON WILLIAMS TRILOGY (I assume; I've never seen Girls), Allison Williams stars as a former cello prodigy who walked away from her prestigious career to care for her sick mother. Now that her mother has passed, she goes back to reconnect with her former teachers only to find that there is a new wunderkind cellist in her place. MAYBE SHE SHOULD DO JEALOUS THINGS TO HER?? MAYBE SHE SHOULD DO SEXY THINGS TO HER?? MAYBE SHE SHOULD DO ... BOTH!
This movie is trash and also it is wonderful. It thinks it's more clever than it is and prides itself more on its twists and turns than it really should. There are parts that made me wonder what the fuck kind of movie it was, but it was never boring. The acting's not bad, but there are some very thankless scenes of screaming and hysteria that overstay their welcome now and again. It's tropey and ridiculous and weird and I can't really recommend it but I liked it and that's all that matters to me.
20.) Tigers Are Not Afraid [Available on Shudder]
A Spanish language film that Guillermo del Toro was talking up quite a bit when it first hit, and with good reason; Tigers feels for all the world like its own unique thing while also blending elements of Pan's Labyrinth and The Orphanage together. It's a story about kids ruined and orphaned by a raging drug war, and specifically a small group of them who have run afoul of the local gang that is propping up a political figure with their illicit deeds. There are some fantastical elements, some ghost story elements, and some "real bad shit that children are forced to navigate" elements that make it pretty clear why del Toro stumped so hard for the movie. I loved it.
Do you miss incredibly trashy straight-to-VHS erotic thrillers from the early 90s? If so, maybe I can interest you in THE PERFECTION, a movie that seems designed to throwback to those tawdry tales of jealousy and revenge and male-gazey lesbian sex scenes. The third in the DON'T TRUST ALLISON WILLIAMS TRILOGY (I assume; I've never seen Girls), Allison Williams stars as a former cello prodigy who walked away from her prestigious career to care for her sick mother. Now that her mother has passed, she goes back to reconnect with her former teachers only to find that there is a new wunderkind cellist in her place. MAYBE SHE SHOULD DO JEALOUS THINGS TO HER?? MAYBE SHE SHOULD DO SEXY THINGS TO HER?? MAYBE SHE SHOULD DO ... BOTH!
This movie is trash and also it is wonderful. It thinks it's more clever than it is and prides itself more on its twists and turns than it really should. There are parts that made me wonder what the fuck kind of movie it was, but it was never boring. The acting's not bad, but there are some very thankless scenes of screaming and hysteria that overstay their welcome now and again. It's tropey and ridiculous and weird and I can't really recommend it but I liked it and that's all that matters to me.
20.) Tigers Are Not Afraid [Available on Shudder]
A Spanish language film that Guillermo del Toro was talking up quite a bit when it first hit, and with good reason; Tigers feels for all the world like its own unique thing while also blending elements of Pan's Labyrinth and The Orphanage together. It's a story about kids ruined and orphaned by a raging drug war, and specifically a small group of them who have run afoul of the local gang that is propping up a political figure with their illicit deeds. There are some fantastical elements, some ghost story elements, and some "real bad shit that children are forced to navigate" elements that make it pretty clear why del Toro stumped so hard for the movie. I loved it.
Re: SHOCKtober
Niku wrote:18.) Event Horizon [Available on Hulu] [Watched with Giant Bomb's Film and 40s commentary]
FYI, if you like Event Horizon, I've got a comic to recommend (again):
Thad wrote:Outer Darkness by John Layman and Afu Chan is good shit.
It's space opera/horror; Layman cites Alien and Event Horizon as influences. Another good description is "Star Trek, but the ship is powered by a chained demon controlled by necromancers, and everyone is a complete bastard."
The first arc just wrapped so the first trade should be on its way.
The second arc's about to wrap, so the second trade should be out before too long.
Re: SHOCKtober
sounds like "Star Trek Into Darkness" was a title wasted on an inferior product. i mean. even more so.
21.) The Hole in the Ground
It's always inevitable that really big smash hits in horror are going to get their imitators, regardless of whether or not they were created with that intent originally. If something worked once, things in a similar wheelhouse are just more likely to get green lit. I saw a trailer for a flick called "Gwen" on Shudder that may as well have been "Gvven" for how much it looked like The VVVVVVVitch. And The Hole in the Ground might as well be called The Wannabebadook. It's a little unfair because hey, maybe they weren't looking for that kind of comparison, but there it is anyway; a single mom begins to grow wary and distrustful of her son, though in this case it's less DEPRESSION METAPHOR and more ANXIETY METAPHOR. Thanks to a giant, super massive hole in the woods near their new house, a nighttime jaunt by her child leading to him behaving strangely the next day, and the local cray-cray who killed her own child, our protagonist soon becomes convinced that her son has been replaced by a doppelganger.
OR MAYBE SHE'S ~CRAZY~!!!!!!! (have i mentioned how over this particular trope i am yet)
Good movie overall, but watch The Babadook instead if you haven't seen it yet.
21.) The Hole in the Ground
It's always inevitable that really big smash hits in horror are going to get their imitators, regardless of whether or not they were created with that intent originally. If something worked once, things in a similar wheelhouse are just more likely to get green lit. I saw a trailer for a flick called "Gwen" on Shudder that may as well have been "Gvven" for how much it looked like The VVVVVVVitch. And The Hole in the Ground might as well be called The Wannabebadook. It's a little unfair because hey, maybe they weren't looking for that kind of comparison, but there it is anyway; a single mom begins to grow wary and distrustful of her son, though in this case it's less DEPRESSION METAPHOR and more ANXIETY METAPHOR. Thanks to a giant, super massive hole in the woods near their new house, a nighttime jaunt by her child leading to him behaving strangely the next day, and the local cray-cray who killed her own child, our protagonist soon becomes convinced that her son has been replaced by a doppelganger.
OR MAYBE SHE'S ~CRAZY~!!!!!!! (have i mentioned how over this particular trope i am yet)
Good movie overall, but watch The Babadook instead if you haven't seen it yet.
Re: SHOCKtober
22.) Hell House LLC 3: Lake of Fire [Available on Shudder]
*big wet poot sound*
diminishing returns in a trilogy that was just okay in the first part anyhow.
*big wet poot sound*
diminishing returns in a trilogy that was just okay in the first part anyhow.
Re: SHOCKtober
23.) Prevenge [Available on Shudder]
OR MAYBE SHE'S JUST CR-- oh, it's pretty clear that she is in this one, actually, alright I guess. The sordid tale of a pregnant woman and the murders her unborn infant are bidding her to do via squeaky voice-overs, this Brit-thriller gets more mileage out of its dry dark humor than any legit scares but there is still some surprising level of gore and a harsh edge to everything that keeps it from being a wacky baby talking comedy with some deaths in it. It's about grief and the pressures pregnancy can put on a woman and really bad dates with disco DJs. It's pretty great.
OR MAYBE SHE'S JUST CR-- oh, it's pretty clear that she is in this one, actually, alright I guess. The sordid tale of a pregnant woman and the murders her unborn infant are bidding her to do via squeaky voice-overs, this Brit-thriller gets more mileage out of its dry dark humor than any legit scares but there is still some surprising level of gore and a harsh edge to everything that keeps it from being a wacky baby talking comedy with some deaths in it. It's about grief and the pressures pregnancy can put on a woman and really bad dates with disco DJs. It's pretty great.
Re: SHOCKtober
24.) Head Count [Available on Netflix]
A movie that doesn't quite know what it wants to be, that wants to be a little bit of all the things it wants to be. It's The Thing! It's It Follows! It's Slenderman! A too-large group of nobody teenagers on a fun desert-party accidentally invoke an internet-creepypasta creature called a Hisji into joining their party by saying its name five times, and it turns out that the monster has kind of a thing for the number five. Because they start to find weird pentagrams carved around, and when their group splits up for the night, the group that was left with only five people suddenly vanishes. Because a Hisji shapeshifts to look like the people around it until it can lure them into being a group of five, at which point its terrible work begins .. or something?
It's really a potpurri of ideas that never congeals into a properly focused perfume, but there's some worthwhile stuff in there. Some decent little scares and scenes, some okay ideas, just a lot of tiny things that work or almost work and probably could have been really good with a bit more focus. It's the kind of thing that makes me interested in the director's (Elle Callahan) next work even if I can't totally recommend her first.
25.) The Exorcist [Available to Rent/Purchase] [Watched with Giant Bomb's Film and 40s commentary which I only recently remembered is actually a premium show so you need to be a subscriber to even download/listen to it OOPS SORRY]
yo the exorcist is good. like, it's still good, just in case you forgot or somehow just wrote it off as one of those classics you don't REALLY need to see because you've picked it up through osmosis and you get the jist and have seen other exorcism movies or so on. I'm still slightly disappointed that in a Twitter poll Giant Bomb decided to watch this one this year instead of their alternative option (the incredible Hausu) but there's literally no bad reason to re-watch The Exorcist. Unless you watched it like, yesterday or something already. Even then. At the very least it'll give you the opportunity to ruefully scream PAZUZUUUUUUUUUUUUU to the uncaring gods above.
A movie that doesn't quite know what it wants to be, that wants to be a little bit of all the things it wants to be. It's The Thing! It's It Follows! It's Slenderman! A too-large group of nobody teenagers on a fun desert-party accidentally invoke an internet-creepypasta creature called a Hisji into joining their party by saying its name five times, and it turns out that the monster has kind of a thing for the number five. Because they start to find weird pentagrams carved around, and when their group splits up for the night, the group that was left with only five people suddenly vanishes. Because a Hisji shapeshifts to look like the people around it until it can lure them into being a group of five, at which point its terrible work begins .. or something?
It's really a potpurri of ideas that never congeals into a properly focused perfume, but there's some worthwhile stuff in there. Some decent little scares and scenes, some okay ideas, just a lot of tiny things that work or almost work and probably could have been really good with a bit more focus. It's the kind of thing that makes me interested in the director's (Elle Callahan) next work even if I can't totally recommend her first.
25.) The Exorcist [Available to Rent/Purchase] [Watched with Giant Bomb's Film and 40s commentary which I only recently remembered is actually a premium show so you need to be a subscriber to even download/listen to it OOPS SORRY]
yo the exorcist is good. like, it's still good, just in case you forgot or somehow just wrote it off as one of those classics you don't REALLY need to see because you've picked it up through osmosis and you get the jist and have seen other exorcism movies or so on. I'm still slightly disappointed that in a Twitter poll Giant Bomb decided to watch this one this year instead of their alternative option (the incredible Hausu) but there's literally no bad reason to re-watch The Exorcist. Unless you watched it like, yesterday or something already. Even then. At the very least it'll give you the opportunity to ruefully scream PAZUZUUUUUUUUUUUUU to the uncaring gods above.
Re: SHOCKtober
The Richard Pryor SNL rip on The Exorcist is gold. A must-see.
Placeholder for something witty that doesn't make me sound like an asshole
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